Life is not a straight line. It's a downpour of gifts, please – hold out your hand

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Saturday, February 23, 2013

The Poem That Found Me

Taos, New Mexico sky.  Photo taken by Kevin Moul

How much is too?

Is 43 years too many to get it, finally 
to see that it's always been 
here, this nameless something 
that sits in quiet center—to trust 
that this heart feels
just what it came here
to feel

I could call it love
but it's so much more than that

for the man on the street whose eyes 
blink sorrow—breathe hope 
when I give 
just the littlest bit 
of what I have.  I can no longer 
tell the difference between you 
and me and I'm sure
I want it to stay
this way.  

Too sensitive.  Too emotional.  Too dreamy.  Unrealistic.

This morning while I ran, soaked deep 
in Oregon rain
breathing in, breathing out
I waved arms in listening air
and belted out loud 
the words to that song
I couldn’t keep from singing

I'm gonna celebrate and live my life 

even though I didn't know 
if there was someone 
coming around that river-y bend.  It felt glorious 
to not care.

I love you.

Can I say these words too often 
as I lean in close
and closer 
to these eyes—
the ones that have forever looked
for more.
Is four decades too long 
to try and grab hold of
what could never 
be held?

Breathing in.  Breathing out.

Is there such thing as too
if all of it leads 
to this that wraps around me
permeates, saturates--satiates
to this that is so much more
than love.

There are wars going on while you write poetry.

I feel your heart like it's my own 
and I don't want this to stop.
Even if it means
I am on my knees
more than sometimes

Thank you poetry for quieting the war.

Until I can find more words 
I'll keep breathing it in
breathing it out

I love you

I do.  
Because when it comes to love
I'm sure
there's no such thing as 


  1. Dear Julia, YOU are the poem that found me. Thank you for seeing the world the way that you do. Thank you for letting Love shine through you. Thank you for being too, for your always-enoughness, for your gathering our tired hearts under your gentle wing. I love you.

    1. Beautiful Amanda--these words from you are some of the sweetest I've ever read about myself..."you are the poem that found me." I'm going to sit here and breathe that all the way in. Whew. Such beauty.

      From every bit of me, thank you, my blessing-of-a-friend.

  2. Such beautiful words, flowing with such grace. You are never too old or young to live in the moments God gives you. Have a lively, passionate, wild birthday lovely sister, you deserve it.

    1. My beautiful sis...thank you for leaving these words for me. I love you a ton. xo

  3. So grateful that through my dear daughter Amanda, I found you, Julia. May we all embrace our too.

    1. I'm so grateful too. Thank you for leaving your presence here...I appreciate it so much.

  4. Amazing what you do with words, Julia. Thank you for sharing your love of life, your love of all of us.

    1. Deb, you bless me. Thank you for always embracing me--what a difference you make in my life.

      Sending tons of love your way.

  5. Replies
    1. I adore you right back, dear Jill.

      Love filled hugs to you. xo

  6. Wow Julia ~ the words in this poem are like music and magic mixed together and floating off this computer screen and into my heart!

    And these:
    " this that wraps around me
    permeates, saturates--satiates
    to this that is so much more
    than love."
    Yes ~ just yes. Thank you SO very much for helping me know this within myself!

    Happy, Happy Birthday Dear Julia ~ the world was blessed the day you were born!

    1. Dear Susie--how very sweet it is to receive these words from you...such a day brighter.

      I am beyond grateful that I've been able to walk beside you in this important part of your journey.

      So blessed to know you, beautiful woman.

  7. Waving arms in listening air...wars while we write our poetry. This love poem, friend, it is exquisite. It settles down deep. It lightens. It inspires. It celebrates. It was your birthday? Happy day! I hope your day was filled with all the kinds of goodness, love, encouragement and tender joy you bring. Thankful for the gift of you.

    1. Ashley, you bless me.

      Thank you for coming here & gracing this space with your beautiful presence & words.

      So happy to call you friend. And thank you for the b-day wishes. :)

  8. wow
    thank you
    for helping make pictures with words
    pictures so powerful that they shift
    my own vista
    within and beyond

    the transformation you speak of is happening
    here too

    thank you!

  9. Dear Christy. You seriously touch me...thank you for always coming here and pouring your love. I feel so damn lucky to be on the receiving end of YOU.

    So happy to hear the transformation is happening there too. A celebration is in order, I think!

    With so much love and gratitude. xo

  10. Just now seeing this. Lovely.


What are you thinking/feeling? I'd really love to know...

♥ Julia