I didn't know
I
could let it pour, softly – fiercely
without thought
of
whether it will be liked
or
understood. I always thought safe
meant
sheltering it, filtering out the too
watering
down the color
when
what I really wanted most –
what I really want
most
is
to let it spill like this relentless
Oregon
rain. Which reminds
me
of that day she sat, head to sky
and
howled with wild abandon
and
how that howl contained
all
the loss and love
her
little dog heart
could
hold
for
the beloved woman
who
would never breathe again. If only
I
could release the ugly and pretty
of
it with a single lamenting
celebratory
howl
without
concern for anything
other
than letting truth
be
truth
letting
me - finally
*Image found HERE
Oh yes, Julia! Let's howl. We'll howl for the empty spaces and the too full parts that confuse and pull. We'll howl for the tender touches and the torn places that never seem to heal. We'll howl for it all—completely—until we're turned inside out, and the emptiness holds us up again. We'll howl with joy for having made room for grief.
ReplyDeleteYour words always find their way inside, filling up the places that were hollow. I love your poem. I love you, my sister.
I would love to howl with my beloved Leah. Leah, you have such a way with words. And love.
DeleteIt is such immense comfort to feel you here with me always.
When I get my own canine to howl, it's usually for a much different reason. ;)
ReplyDeleteThis is such a lovely, sweet, yet sad poem.
Much love to you <3
Aren't dogs amazing, Karin? This poem is actually about our other dog, Lucky, who came to us through my beloved sister-in-law who died (at the young age of 43) a little over a year ago. Lucky is only 3 and is just the most sensitive, loving dog. Shortly ater we got her, I heard the howl (described in the poem) and it touched me so deeply...I knew I would have to write about it one day.
DeleteThank you being hear, dear Karin.
Simply beautiful, Juila.
ReplyDeleteHave you read the book "Women Who Run With Wolves" by Clarissa Pinkola Estes? It's one I pick up again and again, so full of wisdom.
You just keep on howlin. Lift up your chin and let 'er rip!
Love ya!
Thank you, Deb. I have read bits of that book and am always struck by the depth and richness. Thank you for reminding me if it - it may be time to pick that up again.
DeleteI love you, Deb. Thank you for always being here. You are so dear to me.
I love you dearly, my friend.
ReplyDeleteI love you too, Alia. I very much look forward to our next visit. 💗
DeleteJulia,
ReplyDeleteProfoundly beautiful I find these amazingly written words of yours. Along with the beautiful image, I love it all.
Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us. It is such an honor.
Lots of love to you, Sarra
Sarra, thank you for being so generous with your love--I can always feel it deeply and receive it/you with wide open arms.
DeleteI'm so very thankful our paths have crossed...how lucky I feel to know you.
So beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jill. My heart always lights up when I see you here.
DeleteBeautiful, dear friend. Sending so much love.
ReplyDeleteSending so much love back to you, Brooke. Thank you for always seeing through the muck to the beauty-this has truly made all the difference.
DeleteThis is just hauntingly beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Judie. <3
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful. xoxo
ReplyDeleteThank you, my dear friend J. <3
Delete